Episode 13: How about a friendly shrink?
From ABC.com: Lynette doesn’t like the idea of seeing a couple’s therapist; Katherine starts seeing a psychiatrist; Angie doesn’t approve of Danny’s new girlfriend.
Bree
We completely understand why Orson would be furious with Bree, but he’s got to let it go. She made a huge mistake by having an affair with Karl, but at least she’s doing everything she can to make up for it. Meanwhile, Orson refuses to take a bath.
Bree finally takes a stand against her demanding husband and decides to not serve him breakfast until he says “please.” When Orson ignores this request, she puts the mouthwatering plate of waffles with strawberries and whipped cream on a shelf where he cannot reach it.
When Orson’s physical therapist stops by later for his first session, Orson is lying on the ground, whimpering because he fell out of his wheelchair after trying to reach the plate of waffles. To the therapist, it appears that Bree has been mistreating Orson and made him work for his food. He complains that she’s been starving him and begs in front of the therapist, “Can someone please get me a piece of bread?” The therapist shoots a death glare at Bree, who explains, “He wouldn’t say please!”
Bree confronts Orson again when the therapist leaves. Disgusted that he won’t take a bath, Bree drags him outside and hoses him down. Orson begs her to stop, and Bree puts down the hose. Once the two are calm again, Orson explains that he’s just been having a hard time adjusting to not being independent anymore. Bree seems satisfied at his answer and feels a little sorry for him too. It looks as though this couple’s drama may be over, at least for now. This storyline is getting old. We miss the drama Karl brought!
Gaby and Susan
Gaby comes to visit Susan at work (Juanita goes to the same school where MJ attends and Susan teaches art). In math, all the students are grouped by ability level and the groups are named after the animals: leopard, giraffe, and chipmunk. The reason? The principal fears that if parents know which group is the “smart” group, they’ll get competitive. Sounds like the parents have no lives.
Juanita is a leopard, and MJ is a giraffe. Susan speaks with a lot of pride (though not exactly rubbing it in) about MJ’s performance. Although no one except the principal and math teacher knows which group is the most talented, Susan believes she has cracked the code. She noticed that the best art projects are done by the giraffes and the worst are done by the leopards, with the chipmunks somewhere in between.
Random question- what about Karl’s son? He goes to the same school as MJ and Juanita. Wonder what group he’s in? Although he did draw those pictures of his mother being stabbed back in season 5, so we’re going to guess it’s not the smart group…
Gaby, being the overbearing mother that she is, decides to hunt down the principal and find out which group is really the best. Gaby tells the principal, “I just want to know if she’s going to be successful in life,” to which he exclaims, “SHE’S 7!” This is a little like last week’s episode when Gaby imagines how Celia will become successful.
Unable to find out the order from the principal, Gaby stops Juanita, conveniently with two of her friends who are both in different groups than she is, and makes them hold their math homework out. She takes a picture of all of them holding their homework. One of Juanita’s friends is upset that she wasn’t smiling in her picture, to which Gaby, always the supportive woman, replies, “Oh well, it’s a tough world out there, not much to smile about.”
After Gaby leaves, Juanita’s friends tell her that “[her] mom is weird.” Juanita’s response? “You have no idea.” We completely understand Juanita—Gaby’s a whole new level of crazy.
The math homework pictures reveal that Juanita is actually in the smart math class and MJ is in the dumb class. She wants to go over and tell Susan, but Carlos restrains her.
Obviously, this is going to cause a pointless Gaby-Susan fight. Cherry, we love DH, but this storyline has been used before. We get it, Gaby and Susan are competitive over their children and Gaby will pick a fight with anything or anyone with an opinion. Come on already.
However, Susan shows up with MJ’s old math books to help Juanita “catch up.” She’s just as awful, rubbing it in Gaby’s face. Will one of you be the bigger woman please? So Gaby fires back with her knowledge, leaving Susan scared to death. Gaby is such a great friend, especially when she tells Susan that groups don’t really matter and that “you said it yourself: it’s the pace, not the race!”
Later that night, Susan takes Mike outside to discuss the situation. Mike tries to tell her that MJ is very smart and that she’s just overreacting. Susan seems convinced, until she looks in the window and sees MJ with his hand stuck in a water glass.
Susan and Mike encourage him through the window and celebrate when he finally gets his hand out. Unfortunately, their happiness is cut short when Susan exclaims, “Oh no, he’s headed towards the toaster with a fork!”
Now Susan takes on the role of the crazy overbearing mother as she confronts MJ’s math teacher about how he’s doing in class. When the teacher says that MJ is a “joy to have in class” and nothing about how he’s doing academically, Susan reveals that Gaby “broke the code.” She tells all the parents, who immediately begin to freak out about their children. The most advanced group is leopards, then chipmunks, then giraffes, for those keeping track.
Gaby and Susan are called to the principal’s office, where they sit with a kid that ate paste. Susan and Gaby talk and solve their problem: Susan is concerned that because of her job, she doesn’t get to see MJ enough, and Gaby says that she basically has no life except for worrying about her children. We think they should both just calm down a little.
Lynette
Bob and Lee—our two new favorite DH characters, by the way—explain over dinner with Lynette and Tom that they have been attending couples’ therapy sessions. Apparently they’ve been having some marital problems, so they’ve been trying to sort out their issues with a counselor. Lee pulls out his feelings journal and scribbles down some notes. “That’s volume three,” Bob informs the Scavos, “with an entire chapter about me forgetting to put down the toilet seat.”
Tom is intrigued by the idea of going to therapy sessions, but Lynette’s totally against it—probably because she realizes that she and Tom really do need help with their marriage but doesn’t want to admit it.
The next time we see Tom, he’s writing in his own feelings journal. Sample page from his journal: “My wife doesn’t love me…no one respects me…I wish I had someone to talk to about my feelings…” What a whining baby.
When Lynette finds out that he’s written about her, she’s suddenly interested and wants to read some pages. She predicts that “if we downed a shot every time we read the word ‘Lynette,’ I bet we’d be hammered by page two.” Tom refuses to let his wife read his journal unless she attends couple’s therapy with him.
Lynette has a chance to read the journal when it’s sitting unguarded on the kitchen table one morning. As soon as she’s about to pick it up, Tom enters the kitchen and stops her. He snatches it from the table and leaves for work. More intrigued than ever, Lynette drives over to the therapist’s office, bribes a random man with money to take his appointment, and storms in to meet Tom’s therapist.
On the verge of a breakdown, Lynette explains that “I just need, want to feel like I’m in control.” She finally sits down and just lets out all her emotions. Losing her baby hurt her more than she acted like it did. We’re glad to see Lynette is finally getting over her pride of being a stoic woman.
Tom, being the non-manly man that he is, is overjoyed that Lynette is finally willing to try couple’s therapy. Now both Lynette and Tom are toting around their feelings journals everywhere they go and scribbling down their negative thoughts in front of each other. When Tom asks what Lynette’s writing about, she says, “You’ll find out. Tuesday at 2:30.”
Katherine
We were super thrilled for Katherine’s return this week. Anyway, she seems to have recovered from her mental breakdown and is doing alright. During her first therapy session, we hear what Katherine was thinking when she found out Susan was with Mike again.
Katherine admits that she initially tried to forget about Mike, but this plan failed because “he wasn’t really gone. He was across the street.” Things got worse when he got a new girlfriend—her other neighbor. Instead of trying to let her feelings toward Mike go, she let herself pretend that they were still together. “One day I pretended, just for a second, that it wasn’t her [Susan’s] hand he was holding. It was mine,” she says.
We’re probably supposed to feel bad for Katherine here. “I certainly have a firmer grasp on reality now,” she says. “I can see things for the first time in a long while, very clearly.” Good for her. Now she sees how much she could have destroyed everyone else’s lives.
Mrs. McClusky stops by the mental hospital and pleads with Katherine to come home to Wisteria Lane. Katherine says no one will forgive her, but Mrs. McClusky assures her that the other housewives will give her a second chance.
As usual, Mrs. McClusky is right. When she stops by for a second visit, the other Housewives are standing behind her, ready to throw Katherine a forgiveness party. Even Susan, the person we’d least expect to ever forgive Katherine, shows up. While the reunion is cute, we’re still having trouble believing that everyone and everything will be perfectly happy all of a sudden. Plus, we miss the drama that our girl Katherine used to bring every week to the show.
Angie
So apparently Ana and Danny are definitely dating now. Can’t say we’re fans of this couple—Danny did not get over Julie so quickly. Angie (minus Nick) has the young lovers over for dinner. The bad news? Ana isn’t feeling the fattening Italian food. She tells Angie she just wants salad because “to be honest, I don’t eat carbs.” Oh Ana, just be a good guest and eat it!
However, Ana’s not eating carbs because she plans to be a model. Angie isn’t pleased at all with her son’s choice in girls, especially when Ana reveals that Danny likes to write poetry, which Angie didn’t know. Ana is encouraging Danny to pursue his poetry in New York while she models after graduation, to which Angie replies, “So, while you’re doing porn, he can make the dialogue rhyme.” We sympathize with Angie—that’s not the smartest life choice. It’s official. Angie’s going to end this little relationship.
Angie tells Lee that Danny and Ana won’t be together for long because “[Angie] doesn’t approve of her.” Lee tries to convince Angie not to do anything drastic. Apparently Bob chose Lee over his mother. As Lee says, “Yeah, I know what it’s like when a mother hates the hottie her son’s dating.”
So Angie makes an attempt. She takes Ana shopping, and Ana continues to be rude. Um seriously, at least try to get along with your boyfriend’s mother. Ana doesn’t even make an effort. She instead tells Angie that it doesn’t matter how Angie feels about her, because Ana is in her relationship with Danny for the long haul. Ana likes that she can relate to Danny and help him through his tough times in life. Aw, so cute. We still don’t like the couple though. We were sensing a major Angie-Ana bonding moment, but Ana just walks away from Angie.
Predictions for next week:
Thanks ABC, for not showing us the previews for next week! This last episode, while it had its usual witty lines and laugh-out-loud scenes, was rather dull and failed to leave us wondering about what’s to come.
We’re still waiting to find out Angie and her family’s big secret, but we’re doubtful that we’ll find out much about that until later in the season. For now, we’ll hope that Katherine Mayfair will stir up some more drama and that our new favorite neighbors, Bob and Lee become more prominent characters.
Kate Froehlich can be reached for comment at [email protected]
Jenny Hottle can be reached for comment at [email protected]