Sports Reports: Deflategate undermines success

Sports Editor Eric Johnson discusses topics on in-season sports and issues in sports all across America. Reading this column will not only make you chuckle, but it will also change your life in the most positive way known to man.

Eric Johnson, Sports Editor

Recently, the New England Patriots have been called out by virtually every sports website for the deflation of multiple footballs used in the their debacle of an AFC Championship victory over the Indianapolis Colts (45-7) on Jan.18.

However, none of the Colts’ balls lost any pressure at all compared to the significant deflation of the Patriots’ balls.

Some people believed that due to the freezing temperatures, the footballs naturally lost weight. Of course, nobody thought it meant anything because, to the uneducated brain, what are a few pounds of pressure off a football?

Well, let me tell you, young Padawan. A deflated football has significantly increased grip compared to a normally inflated football, which makes it easier to catch or throw.

Some might argue, what does it matter? The Patriots only threw three touchdowns and they outscored the Colts by much more than 21 points.

So entertain this thought: deflated balls provide for an increased grip throughout all conditions. The NFL average fumble per play is around one fumble per 105 plays. New England’s is 187 plays to each fumble. Even so, how is it that none of New England’s four running backs fumbled throughout eight home games this year?

The Patriots were only the third team in 25 years to have never fumbled in any home games in one season. Ironically enough, Patriots’ running backs LeGarrette Blount and Stevan Ridley are known around the league for being prone to fumbling.

Which, okay, I understand that people can go a season without fumbling. However, it’s extremely uncommon for an entire team to escape without any fumbles at home.

Since the NFL has gained four teams since 1990, that’s over 700 football seasons (28 teams times 25 years) where only three teams managed not to fumble at home. Two of these three teams didn’t fumble at all, home or away.

Thanks to statistics teacher Robert Torres’ vast wealth of knowledge that he has bestowed on me, that’s a .004 probability of going a year without fumbling at home.

Sure, the Patriots could have been the one of the luckiest teams in the history of the NFL, but I refer you back to the stunt the Patriots tried to pull back in 2007, known as “Spygate.”

The New England Patriots were disciplined by the league for videotaping New York Jets’ defensive coaches’ signals during a Sept. 9, 2007, game from the sideline. Patriots Head Coach Bill Belichick was fined $500,000, the team was fined $250,000, and the Patriots lost their first-round selection in the 2008 NFL Draft.

If that isn’t suspicious evidence, Patriots’ quarterback Tom Brady and Belichick both were strong advocates of the rule change in 2006 that states that “each team is responsible for their own footballs,” instead of both teams sharing footballs. Since 2006, Patriots’ fumbles have decreased from 150 to 9.

Warren Sharp even did a study on the drastic change in New England’s sudden stoppage of fumbles.

I vote we kick them out of the NFL and give Iowa a team. After all, the Patriots have only won the championship three times since their team began in 1959.

Brady can put on his Uggs and make some lobster rolls to feed Blount instead of a deflated ball.

Eric Johnson is a Sports Editor for The Patriot and jcpatriot.com.