Episode 8: The Coffee Cup
Bree
Karl’s back—he must really love Bree if he’s going to the opera with her! Bree’s really pushing that “more than just passion” connection, which Karl continues to complain about. They’re going to get caught sooner or later.
When Bree comes home, Orson is listening to “Madame Butterfly,” the same opera Bree had just seen with Karl. Orson definitely suspects Bree is up to something and it’s about time. He looks heartbroken. Get over her, Orson. She’s not coming back to you.
Angie shows up at Bree’s house to talk to her about a client. Instead she finds Orson lying on the couch, drinking, while “Madame Butterfly” blasts in the background. Remember when Orson went to jail, Bree started drinking? The tables have turned.
Orson tells Angie that Madame Butterfly kills herself after her lover cheats on her. This seems to be a reflection of his life… is he going to try to kill himself? Orson confronts Angie with his beliefs that Bree is cheating on him, which Angie denies, shocked that the prim and proper Bree would do anything like that. Orson begs Angie to spy on his wife, to which Angie refuses. Orson admits that it’s better if he doesn’t know because he’d do something crazy. We’re thinking that this would entail going-back-to-jail-crazy, or running-over-Mike-again-crazy, etc. Orson and Angie have a lot more in common than they know, although Angie is strong enough to deal with the adulterous actions of her significant other.
Karl makes an appearance at Bree’s house, standing out on her front porch. Way to keep the affair a secret, Karl. He has no shame. He tells Bree he can get her the divorce because Orson is still on parole. He says that Orson can get put back in the slammer if they can get pictures of him in a room with another convict. Meanwhile, Angie’s creeping around to see Orson’s accusations are true. She watches as Karl and Bree go upstairs to her bedroom for some alone time, when Orson comes home. Angie calls Bree to warn her, and Orson slips into the house, spotting two wine glasses. Scandal! Karl gets out the window and stands there, naked, while Bree slides into bed. Orson comes in, and tries to catch her off-guard about why there are two wine glasses downstairs.
Angie walks into the room with one of the wine glasses and tells Orson they had been having a gossip sesh when she ran next door to put a load of laundry in. Orson believes the lie and goes downstairs. Oddly enough, Angie is not mad at Bree. Shouldn’t she be though? After all, she knows what it’s like to be cheated on! Angie tries to make it black and white—just pick either Orson or Karl—but Bree complains about both of the men’s faults. She loves the passion that Karl brings in, but Orson “likes the opera.” She still has a connection with Orson that she doesn’t want to give up yet, which is going to be significant. They’re getting back together soon. Unfortunately. Too bad we still love Bree and Karl together more.
Gaby
Gaby’s going to confession! She tells the priest she tried to bribe someone to get her daughter into a Catholic school— before handing money to the priest. The priest tells Gaby that he moves certain people up on the two year waiting list because “we tend to favor those who are…more faithful.” Gaby takes this to mean those who donate more money, although he tries to explain to her that she should just attend Mass more often. As Gaby says, “I know it’s dark in here, but just know that I’m winking back…”
Gaby interrupts Carlos’ meeting to insist that he write a big check to bribe the priest. He refuses, not wanting to give up the money since he doesn’t know if it will be effective. Gaby, furious, says, “Well, can I borrow five dollars? I’ll buy Juanita a hair net to prepare for her future in the fast food industry.”
Gaby once again tries to bribe the priest. This time she took the check back to the priest even though he insists that it’s not going to work. As she walks away, the priest feels around in his pockets for the check. Oh, that priest is so coming back for more money. He wouldn’t be on Wisteria Lane if he wasn’t corrupt.
Lynette
Tom walks in on Lynette as she’s getting ready for work. None of her clothes fit anymore, so she’s resorted to borrowing from her husband. Tom’s not disturbed by this—he actually likes it. “I’m still attracted to you in men’s clothes. Is that weird?” Sorry, Lynette, only Tom likes your new style. You looked like a real man tonight. We don’t care if men’s style is in fashion. As Gaby said, “That doesn’t make it right!”
Gaby and Lynette continue talking, and Gaby goes in to hug her friend, only to jump back in surprise. “Your stomach just kicked me!” she shouts. Intrigued, Gaby demands that Lynette show her what’s hiding under her massive winter coat. Lynette refuses at first, but Gaby presses on. Finally Lynette reveals that she’s pregnant, begging Gaby not to tell Carlos. Unfortunately, when Gaby is furious, she does what she wants.
Although he didn’t come out and say Gaby told him, it’s pretty obvious that Carlos found out about Lynette’s secret. He walks into her office looking pretty angry, but he doesn’t say anything about her pregnancy. Instead, Carlos announces that he’s promoting her—to be the head of the Miami branch. Naturally, Lynette is upset at the news, and she tells him that he can’t fire her for being pregnant. “I’m not firing you,” Carlos argues. “I’m offering you a promotion.” Tricky, Carlos, but we know that you just want to get Lynette back for lying to you. While we’re not positive what Lynette’s going to do, we can bet that Lynette won’t leave Wisteria Lane. Maybe she’ll just quit her job altogether, but we think that she’s going to win her position back somehow.
Susan/Katherine
Susan’s charged with shooting Katherine and saying mean things about her. She might have odd punishments, but at least Judge Mary Gallagher avoids giving out jail time. Susan ends up having to do community service by cleaning up trash by the side of the road. Katherine, as the kind neighbor that she is, stops by and sees how Susan is doing. “I was just having lunch with some friends that aren’t on a chain gang,” she gloats. “But at the end of the day, I go home to Mike,” Susan replies.
As she is about to drive off, Katherine drops her cup on the ground for Susan to pick up. Another orange jumpsuit-clad person walks over to Susan and tells her that she can report Katherine to the police for littering. Cut to both Susan and Katherine wearing the jumpsuits and cleaning up trash. Oh how sweet revenge is!
A truck drives by, kicking up dust around the two women. Katherine has a coughing fit, which turns into a complete breakdown. Aw, poor Katherine really loved Mike. But why is Susan comforting her? Katherine whines, “Where will I ever find another guy who will make love to me five times a day?” Susan stops in her tracks, wondering if Katherine is serious.
At home, Susan tries to top Katherine’s record, trying to seduce her husband every chance they’re together. But Mike is too tired—and confused—to return her actions. “Can’t we just cuddle?” he asked wearily. Susan breaks down, feeling sorry for herself. Finally Mike tells her that sex was all he and Katherine had in their relationship. “But you and I have everything,” he tells his wife. Aw! Cutest relationship ever. And so the perfect couple is content once again—at least, until the next episode.
Angie
Angie finds Dominic in the Coffee Cup shop with a young waitress rubbing her hands all over him. Gross—why do people find him attractive? He makes us sick through the TV screen.
Dominic at least pretends that he wants to make their marriage work, offering to go to couple’s therapy, to which Angie replies, “Let’s tell somebody all of our secrets and when we’re cured, we can kill him!” All she wants is for him “to be the guy you used to be, the guy who saved my life.” Whoa, how did he save her life? Does this have something to do with the burn mark on her back?
Dominic opens a prepaid phone, the second one we’ve seen in the Bolen family storyline. He says, “Agent Beadea: little memory quiz for you. This is Black Owl.” So Dominic is a secret agent? For some reason, this reminds us of the Fox show “24.” He’s thinking about coming back to something apparently, as long as a certain girl is kept safe.
When he turns around, the coffee shop girl that was touching him before is looking at him. He accuses her of eavesdropping and leaves.
In the next scene, someone enters the store and chokes the coffee shop girl. It has to have been someone who was already in the shop because she asks if the killer forgot something.
Predictions for next week
The killer has got to be Dominic, which is pretty obvious. But then again, Dave was the obvious suspect last year, so Cherry might not be trying to hide the fact that Dominic is a psychopath. Maybe Julie found out too much and that’s why he went after her? You know, in addition to the whole breaking-up with him thing.
Or maybe the strangler is Angie, who’s envious of her husband’s flirtations with other woman. She’s not acting suspicious when it comes to talk of the strangler, but she isn’t too good at hiding her jealousy, like when she ran into Julie and the waitress at the coffee shop.
Mike takes on Katherine and tells her she’s got to stop. Finally, he’s standing up for Susan because this Susan/Katherine fight has gotten a little out of hand. A knife is pulled out—whoa!—but by whom? Mike is an ex-con, so who knows what he’s capable of doing?
Carlos is going to have to forgive Lynette soon, but he’s not giving in that easily. He’s throwing her a surprise party? This is why you don’t hire your friends to work for you, kids. Lynette’s going to have to quit, because she’s not moving away from Wisteria. It is her fault for not telling Carlos from the start, though.
Two weeks until the newest scandals on Wisteria! We’re going to die without our weekly Katherine bashing hour. And we know you’ll miss our always witty commentary.
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